Change is the law of life.

Ask me   A university student trying to live a mentally and physically healthy life. I blog (mostly) about yoga, clean eating, feminism, and lots of TV. Twitter/instagram/fitocracy ErinKwed

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Even though it’s coming out of the mouth of a sociopath, the “Cool Girl” speech resonates with a lot of people. It’s kind of the heart of the book, but we only get a taste of it in the movie. How did it all come about in the first place?

It came about as a writing exercise. Whenever I kind of have writer’s block, I don’t let myself stop writing, but I’ll back away and kind of approach things differently, like these old-fashioned college-writing-class exercises. And so, at the time, Amy didn’t write quizzes. She wrote a column for a women’s magazine. And I thought, I’ll write a column from Amy’s point of view. And I wrote two or three columns, and I wrote the “Cool Girl” column when I was like in a fugue state, all in one afternoon. I never got up. I was just sweating over the keyboard, I was so into it. And I had never really articulated any of that before, and then I really liked it. One of my rules about writing exercises is you never are allowed to put them in your book because it’s just too tempting. You try to shoehorn things that don’t belong. So I didn’t put it in the book for a long time, but I just liked it so much, and it did feel like it came from Amy. It did feel like it had to do with personas and trying on things. It did resonate with what she had been doing. So I felt it was fair play to put that in there. And I’m so glad I did because that’s the one thing I hear about all the time from people.

I think it validates Amy a little bit. First of all, it explains where she’s coming from, but it also explains the tremendous pressure that’s on women, not in a boo-hoo, poor us kind of way, but acknowledging that idea that, good God, there’s something wrong with the fact that we’re constantly willing to make ourselves over for men, that we’re so interested in pleasing men in a way that men would never do for women. As she says, you don’t see men suddenly becoming experts on Jane Austen and joining knitting clubs the way women will teach themselves something. I’m not saying all women do this, or that just because a woman says she likes football means she’s faking it. I love video games. I’d be really pissed off if someone said I loved video games because I was trying to be a Cool Girl.

But I see so many couples where the woman goes out of her way to try to get why her boyfriend or husband likes certain things, and tries to get involved in it in a way that’s not often reciprocated. I think it’s a very female trait to want to please men, and to want to be considered the Cool Girl. And if you take that to the farthest reach where you’re actually selling yourself out, and degrading yourself by doing things you don’t actually want to do, only in order for this man to think that you do, that’s a very perverse thing. That’s like, “Yeah, you win! Larry, let’s tell her what she’s won. She’s won a lifetime of pretending to be someone that she’s not, and for someone to like her for the wrong reasons!” You know?

I like that it’s become kind of shorthand. We all know what we’re talking about when we’re talking about Cool Girl. It’s the putting up with machismo bullshit, and smiling and nodding when you know better. That has a lot to do with it. There’s the pretending, the pretend aspect, but it’s also, “Sure, that’s great!” when it’s not. It’s pretty cool that it’s taken off. It’s a worthwhile conversation to have, and to continue having. There’s not a right answer to it, necessarily. And I don’t think to a certain extent that it’s a bad thing. I remember seeing There’s Something About Mary in the theaters when I was in my 20s, and there’s Cameron Diaz, who looks like Cameron Diaz, but she’s also a doctor, and she also loooves hamburgers, and she starts out playing golf in the morning, and all she wants from a man is a guy who wants to take her to a football game, and she wants to eat hot dogs and drink real beer. Real beer! And I thought, Wow, that’s a cool girl! And then I thought, Oh, right. She’s been invented by guys.

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Gillian Flynn, Vulture (via connietough)

(via hermionejg)

— 2 hours ago with 2026 notes
foreverpruned:

black-american-queen:

dapenguinninja:

giddytf2:

gyrojojo:

leylatimur:

yeeees
why is Ursula shunned from King Triton’s society? does it have something to do with being more powerful than him? why does King Triton have a magical trident, being otherwise a pretty regular merman? Ursula is a witch, if anyone should have a magical artifact it should be her, did King Triton steal it?
and finally, Ursula didn’t do Ariel much wrong
Ariel wanted some legs (and a vagina) and Ursula told her flat out that in the surface world you can have a vagina or a voice, not both
i’d watch the hell out of a movie about Ursula

“Ursula told her flat out that in the surface world you can have a vagina or a voice, not both”
ohhhh shit though, ursula was being too real about the world
although perhaps a bit too literal

Okay, these were all excellent points and I’ll never see The Little Mermaid the same way again.

I laughed at that caption at first then the reality actually hit me

you can have a vagina or a voice, not both”

Omg!!!!

foreverpruned:

black-american-queen:

dapenguinninja:

giddytf2:

gyrojojo:

leylatimur:

yeeees

why is Ursula shunned from King Triton’s society? does it have something to do with being more powerful than him? why does King Triton have a magical trident, being otherwise a pretty regular merman? Ursula is a witch, if anyone should have a magical artifact it should be her, did King Triton steal it?

and finally, Ursula didn’t do Ariel much wrong

Ariel wanted some legs (and a vagina) and Ursula told her flat out that in the surface world you can have a vagina or a voice, not both

i’d watch the hell out of a movie about Ursula

Ursula told her flat out that in the surface world you can have a vagina or a voice, not both”

ohhhh shit though, ursula was being too real about the world

although perhaps a bit too literal

Okay, these were all excellent points and I’ll never see The Little Mermaid the same way again.

I laughed at that caption at first then the reality actually hit me

you can have a vagina or a voice, not both”

Omg!!!!

(Source: tybalt-tisk, via doriangrayshopsatforever21)

— 7 hours ago with 175528 notes

vitalizinq:

The human body has 7 trillion nerves and some people manage to get on every single fucking one of them

(Source: simpl-ic-ity, via peruseproject)

— 12 hours ago with 852273 notes
"

I bet you can tell I’m a woman,” she said, “and I suspect the rest of the world can, too.”

She said she was all too aware that if she was selected, she would represent several hundred male athletes in the NBA; she would deal with league officials and agents who were nearly all men; she would negotiate with team owners who were almost all men; and she would stand before reporters who were predominantly men.

She did not flinch. “My past,” she told the room, “is littered with the bones of men who were foolish enough to think I was someone they could sleep on.

"

Michele Roberts, the new head of the NBA Player’s Union (via emilyisobsessed)

“My past,” she told the room, “is littered with the bones of men who were foolish enough to think I was someone they could sleep on”

“My past,” she told the room, “is littered with the bones of men who were foolish enough to think I was someone they could sleep on”

“My past,” she told the room, “is littered with the bones of men who were foolish enough to think I was someone they could sleep on”

(via duhdoydorothy)

BALL IS LIFE

(via plantaplanta)

black girl supremacy 

(via gadaboutgreen)

She is gon keep all these fools in line. Get it!

(via sourcedumal)

(Source: mdz1971, via katherineida)

— 21 hours ago with 13620 notes

journolist:

When #IfTheyGunnedMeDown Happens in Print: 

Section from the Rolling Stone profile of Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, one of two brothers who committed the Boston Marathon bombings vs section from the New York Times profile of Michael Brown, who was shot and killed by Ferguson, Missouri police officer Darren Wilson. 

H/T to @daviddtss 

(via katherineida)

— 1 day ago with 45435 notes

"I’m confiscating those"

"I’m confiscating those"

image

(Source: hysteriaa, via burgertv)

— 1 day ago with 6639 notes

slytherihn:

Hate that horrible silence while you’re working/studying? Perhaps your music is annoying you? Or maybe you just want to relax. Try these to help you fill the silence:

Try these out and you’ll feel yourself focusing a little more.

Coffitivity is a game-changer.

(Source: mahrtell, via eventhestarsdie)

— 2 days ago with 59057 notes

piccolowasablackman:

robotlyra:

Today on the MBTA, someone called 911 over a lady puking on the subway, claiming she was from Liberia and had Ebola. After they had stopped train service on the Orange line, and escorted her away with a horde of cops and medical responders, it was finally established that she was actually of Haitian descent.

The Ebola epidemic is going to spin off into full-on hypochondriac racism really fast, mark my words.

FUCKING WHAT

(via methodistcoloringbook)

— 2 days ago with 16514 notes